Wolverine and The X-Men #17 - Doop Translations

Luckily, my wife picked up the X-Statix Omnibus awhile back in which I read cover-to-cover. It was like Rosetta Stone for Doop speak. So here's your Wolverine y Los X-Manos #17 translations:

Cover

Doop:          "If you think this is ridiculous, wait'll you see what happens on the inside."

Wolverine:  "You said it, bub."

Page 5

Wolverine:   "What do you say, Doop? Are ypu ready top be and X-Man?"

Doop:           "I think I'm good right where I'm at. Too bad you didn't ask back when being an X-Man still meant something."

Wolverine:   "Very funny, but I'm not leaving until you say yes."

Doop:           "Quit yourself."

Page 7

Wolverine:    "I'll give you full medical and dental. You get to set your own hours. You'll answer only to me."

Doop:            "Hmm...I'm thinking about it."

Doop:            "We'll talk more after you're done."

Wolverine:    "Fine. But if you don't say yes after this, to hell with you."

Wolverine:     "My name is James, and this is my impression of Cyclops...with six-inch claws stabbed into his face."

Doop:             "Okay. You win. I'm yours."

Page 9

ALERT!

Doop:             "Wha..!?"

Page 10

Nazi Bowler:  "Splendid. Ready your balls fpr destruction, my brothers!"

Doop:             "You can say that again!"

Page 11

Nazi Bowler:  "You dare! You dare steal the ball of a fourth reich thursday night intramural league champion! return it at once, you green-skinned monstrosity!"

Doop:              "If you insist."

Page 15

Howard the Duck:  "We've been in some tough spots before, pal, but never anything like this. What do you think we oughtta do?"

Doop:              "Kill them all, or die trying."

Page 17

Sabretooth:    "Damn it, you green lump of snot. Are you even listening to me?!"

Doop:             " I am now."

Hope that helps! I loved this issue and hope we get to see more Wolverine and Doop adventures, but only penciled by Mike Allred. This has inspired me to create a Doop font set.

Comic Book Day!

Today I did not go to the comic book store to get my pulls for this week. Instead I got home to see a very special little box waiting for me with my comics for the entire month of November, minus a few that I bought at the store. Here's the list:

Journey Into Mystery #631
Anticipation:   6/10


I really loved the Fear Itself tie-ins of this book. Gillen is killing on story duties. I have been really turned off due to Whilce Portacio's art. I just hate it. Another problem that probably just emphasizes my weaknesses is that these are some wordy bastards. There is alot of text in both narrative and dialogue form, and it's starting to lose me. It's disappointing that these things are hurting the book for readers like me, but I'm not feeling it like I did eight issues ago.

Venom #9
Anticipation:  7/10


I have only read Venom #7, and it was in the middle of an event, but I enjoyed it pretty decently. The art was clean, and Rick Remender just continues to blow me away with his sensitivity to the characters that he writes. I'm hoping this issue will pull me on board more. I may end up buying the first trade if this one rocks.

Frankenstein: Agent of S.H.A.D.E.  #3
Anticipation:  9/10


After the deluge of books that I had to make decisions about in September, Frankenstein is sticking around out of pure fun. There's nothing I need to know to enjoy this book, and that is what I was looking for in the New 52. I was a Marvel guy looking to taste some new books from DC and this one hooked me. I love Alberto Ponticelli's gestural artwork. It's so organic. Jeff Lemire is knocking my socks off with Animal Man, and I can't wait to get caught up on Sweet Tooth. I am discovering that I love the old movie monster genre with this book. I think folklore and fairy tales are perfect for the comic book medium.

Sweet Tooth #27
Anticipation:  --/10


As I mentioned above, I am not caught up with Sweet Tooth.I have read the first trade and I intend to get every trade until I am caught up. This unfortunately means that I refuse to read current issues as to not spoil the series. I have faith in Jeff Lemire and want to support him by buying his comics, even if I can't read them just yet. I guess you could say my anticipation is very high, but I really can't say because I haven't read the last issue yet.

Punisher #2
Anticipation:   5/10

I have never read a Punisher book. Okay, that isn't exactly true. I remember reading a few Punishers back when I was a kid. Something about a war journal and some guy named Jigsaw, probably nothing worth mentioning. Uh huh, I went there. I bet those comics are worth a small fortune now. Anyway, this comic was on special discount from DCBS and I refuse to turn down a 35 cent comic. If it's crap, oh well. If it isn't, then awesome. Punisher should be something that appeals to me because I tend to enjoy self-contained, street level comics. I honestly don't have any expectations, so I don't see how it can be bad.

Daredevil #6
Anticipation:  10/10

Speaking of street-level comics, this iteration of Daredevil has got it all. I think this is the best comic from Marvel that I am reading right now. The artistic presentation of this is so clever and dynamic. I think the best part about the art is that it just looks like a comic, but with those brilliant touches that just push it into greatness. The cover, for instance, is a tribute to DD's father, who was a boxer. It looks like an old fight poster. I love it. Mark Waid is outperforming every writer at Marvel and most other publishers at the moment. He was made for this book. I can't wait to read this, but I will probably save it for last just because I know it will be amazing. What I am dreading is seeing DD as an Avenger in this. Just leave him alone, dammit!

Ruse #1
Anticipation:  4/10

This was another 35 cent comic. I saw some promos for this, but have no idea what this is about other than it's kind of a Sherlock vibe. No expectations really.

Sigil #1
Anticipation:  4/10


Same as above. No idea, but it was 35 cents.

Villains For Hire  POINT 1
Anticipation:   6/10


So, I ordered the second issue of this and didn't realize that this was a dreaded point one issue. Wtf is that Marvel? Why are we still doing this? It's especially confusing when a first issue is a point issue. Anyway, this looked appealing to me simply because it sounds like a Secret Six or Thunderbolts kind of comic. Then I remembered that Marvel already has a Thunderbolts kind of comic. It's called Thunderbolts. I can't believe I used that logic to choose this comic over, well, Thunderbolts. I keep wanting to just on for Thunderbolts, but I somehow always end up cutting it from my pull list. I had the comic shop pull last weeks issue, so I'll get a taste of it.

Batwoman #3
Anticipation:  8/10

What's not to love about this comic? The art is awesome. The story is kind of easy to follow, sometimes. I don't care, it's just beautiful. You can tell I'm getting burnt out on this post. I've never precapped a load of comics this large, and my neighbor has started slamming kitchen cabinets downstairs. I'm losing focus. FIGHT THROUGH IT! DIG DEEP! Gonna speed things up.

Swamp Thing #3
Anticipation 9/10


Love this book.Can't wait to see when it ties into Animal Man. Snyder is rocking it. Should be reading Batman as well. Moving on!

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles #4
Anticipation:  9/10

This is bringing back memories of my youth. Nostalgic awesomeness. Love love love. Should be reading Ghostbusters and Godzilla. Moving on!

Wolverine and the X-Men #2
Anticipation: 10/10


I think Wolverine took all the fun with him when he left Utopia. Who'da thunk it? It's such a weird switch for Jason Aaron also wrote the super dark, super serious Red Right Hand arc in Wolverine. Then again, Wolverine is pretty funny in his own title now, too. I think Chris Bachalo's art is awesome and I have always liked his whimsical style. This comic is wonderful. I am going to hate it when Bachalo inevitably gets taken off of this book for no reason. I predict he will be moved to Avenging Spiderman after Joe Mad and Greg Land get rotated out. Please keep the art fun on this, Marvel!

Chew Vol 1 Taster's Choice
Anticipation:  9/10


This trade was super-cheap on DCBS (only $5.99). I have heard nothing but positive things about this comic. Can't wait to read it!



Well, that's my entire order. I'd better get to reading them! Now the problem will be choosing what to read first!

Comic books day! - Quick reviews

Journey Into Mystery #630
Anticipation: 6/10

I'll be honest. I loved the entire Fear Itself run of these comics, but near the end I was so fed up with Fear Itself that it was a pretty laborious read. I will say that this title has been one of the only relevant tie-ins to the event and you could basically read Fear Itself #1, Fear Itself #7, and then all the Journey books to get the full story. In addition to being burnt out on Fear Itself, the art in the last three issues has been Whilce Portacio. So that's been hard to get through. This one was a refreshing recap of the event through the bardic storytelling of Volstagg to his many children that I just learned he had. It was a nice way to end the event.

Justice League Dark #2
Anticipation 6/10

This title will hold me for two reasons. The first is that it gathers different characters that wield arcane arts as opposed to the standard superpower team book. I'm not used to reading books like that. The second reason is pure curiosity. The art is fantastic and I want to see where all this is going.

The Flash #2
Anticipation  9/10

This is one of the New 52 that surprised the hell out of me. I expected to take some interest in the more obscure titles, but not any of the A-list superhero comics. This is a classic superhero/everyday guy story. It's like classic Spidey. That alone is reason to interest me, but the visual quality of this title is jaw dropping. When you can get me to look at a page without words for more than a few minutes, you've done something amazing with visual storytelling. Manapul continues to astonish me with each issue. I read this back-to back with the Daredevil book I picked up and they each spoke to me in the same way. There is a several-page sequence in which Barry figures out how to literally think faster. Over the course of about 4 pages, you are told about so many things that happen in about one second of story-time.
You have to see it to understand. I really enjoyed this.

Animal Man #3
Anticipation 10/10

This title has knocked my socks off and made my eyes bleed from the first issue. This is a wonderful book. Jeff Lemire is just hitting it out of the park with the story and Travel Foreman is making me so creeped out by the horrific and grotesque visuals. This is a perfect horror book. It's making me think of the Vault of Horror books I used to pick up at the grocery store when I was eight. I haven't read much horror since then, but this is making me crave it. Truly a visual feast of horrific delights!

Daredevil #5
Anticipation 9/10
I'm finding myself drawn to the more small-scale heroes lately. Daredevil is surely one of Marvel's A-listers, but he battles street thugs and corrupt corporations instead of global and cosmic threats. It doesn't hurt that, like The Flash, the visual storytelling is unique and exciting. We "see" the world through Daredevil's "eyes", so to speak. The way he experiences his environment is through sound is expressed with such care and subtlety, that we can really understand his radar sense. I personally love it when he hears the guys moving up the stairs and can tell they are wearing nightvision goggles by the hum of the device. Then we see a narrative box that says, "Six armed mercs with nightvision. Whatever shall I do?". Then we see him turn on the light switch and blind them all. Brilliant. Another subtle sound cue is found when we see a series of R's scrawled across the panels gradually getting larger. Then we see that it was a speed boat approaching. So cool! Pick up this book. I don't care who you are. Just...buy this.

Wolverine and the X-Men #1
Anticipation 8/10

I'll be honest, I was a little hesitant about this. It's only because I love the X-Men and any changes in the status quo scare me. Jason Aaron has proven that he can write Wolverine, but what of an X-Men team book? Well, I am happy to say that this book was fun as hell and I'm excited for the series. It's opening day of the Jean Grey School for Higher Learning, and the faculty have to deal with a couple of state inspectors. I'm glad to see Logan and Kitty in charge, and Beast is a refreshing sight. Chris Bachalo's art is always fun. He has always been one of my favorite artists. It's also great to see the X-men in a school again. I get so burnt out on the constant battling happening on Utopia and like seeing the characters be characters and not just fighting. I'm happy with this and hope the book maintains this mood. Did I not call that Krakoa would be showing up? Yeah, I did.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles #3
Anticipation 8/10

IDW bought all the comics rights to my favorite childhood passtimes; Godzilla, Ghostbusters, and of course TMNT. With the creator of the Turtles on writing duties I don't really give a crap that the origin is different. I love reading Turtles again. All-red-bandana Turtles, at that! This is a great throwback. I don't mind the $3.99 cover price. In fact, the pages of this book feel heavier. I feel like they are printed on sturdier stuff than the Marvel and DC books I've been reading. Anyway, if you loved TMNT in the 80's and 90's, check this book out. It's got good art and is really worthwhile.

Giant Size Wolverine and the X-Men - Now with more races!

Is this...Krakoa? Seriously? Is it? Because if it is, then holy shit.

In case you don't know, Krakoa is a mutant. This mutant's powers are being an island. It's an island. Four of the original five X-Men were captured and Xavier had to recruit a new team to save them. This team consisted of Storm, Wolverine, Colossus, Banshee, Nightcrawler, Sunfire, and Thunderbird. It gave Marvel a chance to show that it is diverse and went from a whole-grain white bread team to a rye-pumpernickel team with a lox shmear. Anyway, they saved the X-Men and Beast, Angel and Iceman joined the Defenders and the new X-Men became the regular X-Men.

Later on, Ed Brubaker retconned the entire thing and as it turns out, this team of X-Men was actually the second team Xavier recruited. The first team consisted of Vulcan, Sway, Darwin, and Petra. This team was a million times more powerful than the Giant Size counterparts, yet they all met their end on their first mission, or so it would seem. Vulcan survives and makes trouble for the X-Men, The Shi'ar, and the Inhumans later in life and Darwin never dies, so he shows up alive and joins the X-Men and later X-Factor. So, basically, a Russian that can turn into a can of beets and a Canadian in need of a manicure defeated a villain that a guy who could destroy planets could not defeat. Makes perfect sense.

That being said. If this is indeed Krakoa, and that is a uneducated guess, I think it would be entertaining. Especially with Bachalo on pencils. That guy is always entertaining.