X-Men: First Class or No Class?

Here it is, a few weeks later and I'm getting around to my thoughts about the X-Men movie that I almost boycotted.

There have been a total of five X-Men movies now, and the last two have left many of us wanting. X-Men: The Last Stand was a melancholy depress-fest that introduced too many characters that didn't get developed properly and left us feeling like slitting our wrists.

X-Men Origins: Wolverine was a joke with no punchline. It was impossible to take seriously and, again, suffered from poor character development and crowding.
I liked the first movie simply because it wasn't terrible and I was finally getting to see my favorite comic series on screen. This was before the comic book movie industry made an industrious comeback and the quality started declining.

X2: X-Men United was a good movie. It took alot of creative license in regards to the X-Men canon, but every comic movie does. At least it had the gall to be an enjoyable movie.

Being lifelong X-Fan, I obviously have alot of things to say about the newest movie movie. I'll keep it restricted to non-bulleted lists with a few key points.

Things that were handled incorrectly, in no particular order: *SPOILER*
1. Magneto and Xavier were supposed to meet in Israel.
2. The first class was supposed to consist of Cyclops, Marvel Girl, Iceman, Angel, and Beast.
3. Sebastian Shaw appears to be a mixture of Sebastian Shaw, and Bishop. ( Sinister, his energy absorbing powers work to make him physically stronger in the comics. They do not give him the abilty to release energy. That is Bishop's power.)
4. Moira is supposed to be Scottish.

5. Xavier is supposed to lose his hair when his telepathic powers manifest.
6. Xavier first loses the use of his legs when an alien named Lucifer drops a boulder on him, not from a bullet that Magneto deflects.
7. Beast and Mystique have no romantic relationship in the comics.
8. Mystique and Xavier are not lifelong friends in the comics.
9. Riptide and Azazel are not in the Hellfire Club.
10. Riptide does not control wind, but can spin his body at high speeds and hurl flakes of his own skin that resemble shurikens.
11. Beast does not create a serum to look like a normal human, but creates a serum to kick-start latent mutant abilities. (This happens after he leaves the original X-Men and is somehow reversed when he joins X-Factor)
12. Emma Frost does not have her diamond ability until after she reforms and has her secondary mutation triggered by the destruction of Genosha.
13. Sebastian Shaw is not a part of Magneto's origin.
14. Havok does not join the X-Men until after Cyclops.
15. Darwin does not join the X-Men until after four of the original five are captured but Krakoa.
16. Banshee does not join the X-Men until after Xavier's first team is annihilated, with the exception of Darwin, who doesn't appear again for many years.
17. Angel Salvadore never officially joins the X-Men, but is rescued from U-Men by Wolverine much later and attends the institute for a short time. What ever happened to her, anyway? Not that I care.
18. Most of the ages are kind of screwed up.
19. There was no after-credits scene.
20. Banshee didn't have an Irish accent.
21. January Jones was terrible.
22. Hellfire Club...in a sub?

Things I liked:
1. It wasn't X-men: The Last Stand.
2. It wasn't X-Men Origins: Wolverine
3. Wolverine appeared for a brief cameo, and was not heard from for the rest of the movie.
4. Rebecca Romjin made a cameo.
5. James McAvoy and Michael Fassbender put on a good performance and had plenty of screen time.

When I heard that Emma Frost and Banshee were being cast for this movie, I thought that maybe their history was going to be represented well. But no. Not a chance.

I will say that it was somewhat enjoyable and it sits right in the middle in relation to the other movie. I didn't like it as much as the first two, but I didn't hate it as much as the last.

I give this movie two pointless characters with no lines down, and one Hellfire Sub down, and one blue kitten to the right.

"I can't talk about it anymore. It's giving me a headache."

"Are you ok, Charles?"

"Yes. I'm just pressing the button on my temple that activates my Optic Blasts."

"You mean telepathy?"

"Yes. That's what I said."

Thor punches a dog

Sorry, had to get your attention. It has been two months, after all.

This blog post is rated mature for language and incredulous opinionated humor.

So as you can imagine, I have read alot of comics and seen a couple of comic movies since last we met. I'll be seeing Green Lantern tomorrow, which I have high hopes for, but that's probably because I don't read Green Lantern and won't have to pick apart any canonical discrepancies.

ONWARD

 Thor is a movie about magical god-beings from the realm of Asgard that enjoy indiscriminately beating blue people and taking relaxing jaunts up and down a sparkly rainbow bridge.

First of all, I don't give a shit about black Heimdall. It's not that critical that the character be white, it doesn't change anything or take away from the story in any way. I only feel compelled to mention this detail because of the klan meetings that have spotted every comment section of every trailer that was posted for this movie. Get over it. If Ultimate Nick Fury can be black, than shut up.

I really don't care about physicist Jane Foster, either. She isn't going to be in The Avengers movie, and the fact that she was changed from a nurse in the comics to a physicist in the movie doesn't really annoy me past the confusion as to why they even bothered to change it. It doesn't make much sense, but again, doesn't change a damn thing. I'm sad that Odin sent his son to Midgard(not Earth) to be humbled and didn't place him in the body of a disabled doctor. The only fan service that was paid to the Dr. Donald Blake alias was a crummy name tag. Also, where did Jane Foster get the fake ID with a picture of Thor on it, and why wouldn't S.H.I.E.L.D. notice?

That's another thing. Why does S.H.I.E.L.D. suck so much? This is America's, nay, the world's best defense against threats of planetary levels, and they can't spot a fake ID? I was glad to see a Hawkeye cameo, but it wasn't really elaborated on. One thing I would like to see in the Avengers is more Hawkeye and some Hank Pym. I mean, Pym is extremely important in Avengers canon. It seems kind of sad to think of him not being a part of the film or at least mentioned. No Ultron, I guess.

 One major minor gripe of mine is the way in which Thor holds his hammer while flying. This is something I was paying attention for and I was disappointed that he held Mjolnir by the handle and not by its strap. It's a minor complaint, but I see it as an important detail.

The cast was relatively well executed. Renee Russo has too much talent for as little of a role she played. Sir Hopkins was a good choice for Odin. I could see few other men commanding the presence of Odin in such a way.

As I've said I really thought Idris Elba played a great Heimdall.

The warriors three were good, but again, not used enough. I thought Fandral, in particular, seemed to be executed well. I think Cary Elwes circa Men in Tights was channeled for this role.

Jaimie Alexander was a good Sif. Another character that was robbed of screen time. She is beautiful, and can play the warrior well. I have to admit I like her a hell of a lot better than Natalie Portman. I used to love Natalie Portman. I don't know exactly where she fell off for me.

Tom Hiddleston was a convincing Loki and I feel he steals the show. This is almost more of a Loki movie than a Thor movie, and I'm fine with that. I love Loki and hope we see a ton of him in Avengers. Clearly *spoiler alert* he is coming back and plans of utilizing the Cosmic Cube.

I enjoyed the movie quite a bit. The gripes were few and didn't detract from the overall experience.

One thing I really can't forgive, however, is The Destroyer. In the comics, this thing has beaten the crap out of a fully empowered Thor time and time again. In the movie, once Thor gets his powers back, he takes it out in ONE HIT. This was pretty disappointing for us fans that were expecting a big Destroyer battle. Fell short.

I give this movie two flagons of mead up, and one weak-ass Destroyer to the side.

Oh, and here's this: